Being a father and being a leader

“I’m sure and I’m looking forward to feel that new era.”

A friend and former colleague wrote this to me when I told him about life with a little baby, and it inspired me to write a few words.

Being a father and a leader feels pretty much the same to me.

Three years ago, I was about to finish my presentation for the Leadership Fundamentals training with Growio, and I had decided to talk about my leadership journey.

At first, I wanted to speak about people who inspired me – like Bob Marley, Vicente del Bosque, or Chuck Berry. But I quickly realized this should be about me, not someone else.

We can always be inspired by others, but the journey is personal. I looked back at what defines me, who I am, what my values are, what makes me a leader, how my journey has been, and where I want to go. I understood that leadership is a journey, not a final destination. It’s a process of growing.

Just like in leadership, parenting brings a lot of advice and opinions from others – but the journey is still yours.

People will always try to give you advice or tell you how things should be. But for me, it’s personal. I listen to everyone, but I know myself best.

Being a parent – a father – is the same. You ask people for advice, and sometimes they give it even when you don’t ask. They speak from very personal experiences, which in some parts might be similar, but still come from how they’ve lived things.

That’s true in both roles – whether leading a team or raising a child, I’ve learned to trust my own instincts.

Most of the time, people try to warn you about what’s coming.

If you say your baby is sleeping well, they’ll say, “Just wait until next month – you won’t sleep at all.” Or if you say you’re excited for your child to start crawling or saying their first words, some will tell you, “You’ll wish you were back when they didn’t do any of that.”

Of course, I try to imagine how things will be as my baby grows, and sometimes I think back to the early days when the baby was so little and looked like a completely different person. But for now, my wife and I just enjoy the moment. We enjoy each day for what it is, and I’ll let the future version of us deal with what’s next.

Whether it’s in leadership, parenting, or other parts of life, I believe it’s important to live in the present.

There are other parts of my life where I do worry about the future, but I believe that in every situation it’s important to live in the present. So, I’m trying not to worry too much about what’s ahead and focus more on living in the now.